If you’ve been following my blog of late, you’ll see I am on a kick to pay homage to the various well-being activities that have been a big part of my life, all under the Bend Burn Breathe (B3) ethos. Most recently, I’ve mused about my love of meditation and mindfulness, which falls under “bend,” which is all about having a flexible and plastic mind. I’ve also written about my love of yoga, weight training, and spinning, which falls under “burn,” which is about a strong and healthy body. Now, I come to the third prong of the B3 ethos, “breathe,” which is all about the heart and what we do to feel alive, joyous, and connected. For me, a significant part of that has been through nurturing my creativity in the performing arts. Today’s ode is to a major passion of mine: dancing,
As the story goes, when I was three years old, my mother took me to see ballet for the first time (a performance of the Nutcracker at Lincoln Center). As soon as it ended, I turned to her and said, “I want to do that.” My fantastic mom promptly enrolled me in a ballet class in the Lower East Side of New York City. One of my first memories is jumping over record covers in a ballet class with a scarf! Thus, my more than a-decade-long foray into serious ballet began. To say I was obsessed would be an understatement. I loved the rigorous training in particular. As I progressed from one level to the next, I truly appreciated what my body could do. Some of my best childhood memories are spending up to eight sweaty hours a day training at Joffrey Ballet in New York City’s West Village in the 1980s. By my early teens, though, my body rebelled – knee tendonitis, a broken toe, and puberty collided, putting my ballet dreams to rest. Thankfully, I could eventually pivot to modern dance, which I pursued in college as one of my two bachelor’s degrees. Alas, a torn hip muscle also upended that dream (and turned my hand to acting). Post-college, musical theatre dance auditions also became increasingly painful and difficult. I tossed in the dance towel by my mid-twenties and pivoted to physical theater and performance art, or so I thought.
Dance, however, was my first and most comfortable language of art, and it wouldn’t take long to find another avenue to move my body. In 2000, I was introduced to Japanese butoh dance and invited to perform in a piece with the Ancient Touch Butoh Ensemble while attending grad school in California. This experience would be transformative. Butoh dance is primarily a slow-moving, meditative form of dance grounded in embodied experience, often recalling cycles of life (I am being general here), such as birth/death and light/dark, as well as diving deeply into the darker sides of the psyche where the “beautiful grotesque” is lauded (you can read more about the history of butoh here). Because it wasn’t based on highly choreographed moves, I could move in a way that just felt good. Nothing hurt!
A year later, I returned to NYC and sought out training, which I did in earnest. By 2004, I choreographed and performed my first solo butoh-inspired piece. The rest is history. I have been creating this type of work on and off over the years ever since.
However, I am compelled to share this with you because “just dancing” is not as easy as it sounds. Despite my passion for movement, I’ve struggled to dance consistently over the years – not just for the stage or camera. I mean moving and grooving my body because it’s fun and feels good. When was the last time you danced in any way? I know that many people think they are terrible dancers, but that shouldn’t preclude you from experiencing the joy of moving your body in space – and we are our worst critics! Here are some ways I’ve found to get myself back into the groove and some resources to check out:
Close the door and dance to your favorite music privately: Nothing can inhibit dancing more than feeling self-conscious. If you fall into this category, choose a tune that inspires you to move. Close your eyes and let the beat infuse your body. You may find that muscle memory takes over as you recall dancing as a kid or teen. Let Tom Cruise inspire you in his iconic dance from Risky Business!
Hit the dance floor at the next big social event: For some, dancing in a crowd where you can blend in can be just the thing. Instead of sitting out, take a deep breath and allow yourself to move to the beat with others, boosting social and mental well-being.
Try a dance class: You can do this in two ways, virtually or in person. If you are more inclined to stay solo, there are several online dance classes that you can try. One of my all-time favorites is Body Groove, created by Misty Tripoli. It’s now an app with an extensive library that guides you to move in your own way. The other way is to try a live dance class – a cardio dance class at the gym like Zumba, social dancing like ballroom or tango, or a line dance, hip-hop, or ballet class at the local dance studio. I was a real gym/dance snob and snubbed my nose at Zumba until I tried it. Leave the critic at home and permit yourself to be a beginner when starting something new.
One of the sure-fire ways to add more movement to your life is to keep a playlist on hand of your favorite dance songs or ask friends and family for theirs. I created one from personal favorites and recommendations called Kat’s Living Room Dance Party. The next time you feel stressed or want to let off some steam, play that song and move to your heart’s desire.
Cover photo: Steve Zak
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